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Flexibility (Part Two): You CAN Have Your Cake and Eat It Too!
By Cornelia Powell | November 30, 2008
“The mountains teach you to be flexible,” my friend Debra said to me when visiting recently. She came to install the closet she designed for my little (almost complete) cabin home perched on a steep mountainside. Her wise reminder was in response to my stories about the challenges created in the building process of said “perch” and the road leading to it.
Learning to be flexible is one of the main life lessons during any rite-of-passage — whether the passage is building a new home, planning a wedding, or creating a new phase of your business. And when you’re attempting to “stay on a budget” as well, the challenges mount and flexibility indeed comes in handy for a more peaceful and satisfying transition. (The old “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” trick!)
I read an article recently about “brides on a budget” — which can only be a good thing in the runaway world of over-the-top weddings — and how being flexible inspired some surprising creative ideas. The Newsweek article spoke of brides-to-be “hit with a dose of reality” when faced with how “paying for their dream wedding was going to require some creativity” as well as an attitude shift.
Some of the budget ideas mentioned by reporter Ashley Harris included: brides wearing “gently used” wedding gowns; couples sending out handwritten invitations instead of engraved ones; not using a DJ at the reception and plugging in the couple’s iPod instead; and serving “fake” wedding cake. (The reporter explained: “Some brides buy wedding cakes made of Styrofoam [except for one tier to use for the cutting ceremony], then serve the guests cheap sheet cake.” Hmmm. I’m not sure about this one!)
So it’s true: Being flexible means you CAN have your cake and eat it too! (I think this is a great title for a new wedding book!) The flexibility of these couples helped them experience a happy wedding day without doing everything by some wedding “rule book.”
Whatever rite-of-passage you are moving through or about to approach, remember that you cannot always control exterior circumstances — like trading an extravagant, tiered wedding cake for a less expensive sheet cake (or for a big stack of homemade brownies for that matter!) — but you can always control interior circumstances. As Conversations With God author Neale Donald Walsch says:
“Your internal world — the reality that you encounter within your mind and emotions — is a world that you and only you control and create. How you experience everything is up to you. Your reactions need not be automatic or similar to ones you have had before.”
Being flexible helps us see that in fact there is a difference in external and internal circumstances and gives us pause to be able to choose which is more important. Being flexible is rolling with the punches and appreciating whatever type “cake” life cooks up (or mountainside you’re climbing!) — then welcoming the creative opportunities that come with the experience.
Love. Listen. Let go.
… with love from Cornelia
Topics: For Brides, Inspiration, Women's Notes |