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Weddings at the Movies
By Cornelia Powell | February 21, 2009
Introduction:
Going to the movies is a treat for me! I see a film either because I’ve read the early Hollywood scoop that intrigues me, or because a favorite actor plays a role, or maybe it’s a period piece with great costumes, or sometimes, even when the movie doesn’t sound very appealing, I go as part of my “culture study.”
This unofficial study centers around the nature of weddings, being a bride, and the ceremonies of life and how films portray these ritual celebrations. I find this acts as a gauge as to how we’re doing as a culture. (I don’t have to tell you that we haven’t been doing so well lately.) And I have a particular interest in the impressions movie portrayals make on young girls.
Scene I:
I headed to my mountain neighborhood’s one movie theater to see the highly publicized “Bride Wars.” The title alone was evidence that we’ve continued to slide down the slippery slope of shallowness, but my “culture study” called.
Standing in line for tickets at the small “cineplex” in Sylva, North Carolina ($4.00 for seniors, $3.00 for fresh popcorn—I’m in heaven!), I got behind a group of excited little girls. Probably eight to nine years old, they were there to see the Disney release, “Hotel for Dogs.”
The more precocious of the bunch, noticing the line-up of movie posters beside us, kept asking her group if they had seen “Bride Wars.” As each girl shook her head, she repeated—as though she knew some grown-up secret—”Oh, it was sooooooooo funny!” It seemed that the more she asked, the more the next girl became “programmed” to have her response match the group leader.
I thought of those impressionable little girls a few minutes later as I sat in the theater watching the very “unfunny” movie. The two main characters—”bubble-brained and consumer driven”—best friends Liv and Emma (actors Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway), played mean-spirited dirty tricks on each other around a wedding date mix-up. (”…a not so romantic comedy with tired slapstick pranks but not an ounce of self-respect or intelligence,” reported one movie critic.)
I wanted to go gather up all those little girls, introduce them to some wise grounded women friends, and intend that they develop the self-confidence needed to think for themselves. Even when cultural peer pressure breathes nervously down their tender necks.
Then I bet they’d all agree with the verdict of another movie critic: “Mean instead of funny, loud instead of clever and shrill instead of romantic, ‘Bride Wars’ is far more familiar with—and cause for—tantrums than celebrations.”
Whether art imitates life, or life imitates art, I think that we all could propose: “No more terrible wedding movies!” But just in case, I’ll keep my “culture study” going and report back to you. In the meantime, go make an inspiring impression—take a little girl out for a real-woman (or real-guy) chat!
Scene II:
My “culture study” needed a lift. I went to see “Last Chance Harvey” starring Dustin Hoffman and Emma Thompson. (The movie trailer declared: “It’s never too late to open your heart…to change your life…to take a chance.”) I figured with these two intelligent actors that the movie would at least have a well-written script whether the characters were appealing or not.
Harvey, a bit of a sad-sap long-divorced workaholic—flies to London for his daughter’s wedding. The awkwardness is apparent between the estranged father and daughter as he tells her he plans to rush back to his work in New York right after the ceremony, missing the reception, and she tells him that she asked her stepfather (played by a debonair James Brolin)to give her away.
Harvey indeed leaves the wedding early (where he had dejectedly sat in the back of the church) and meets more disappointments with a missed flight, lost job, and just the boredom of his life. Heading to an airport bar, he meets Kate, the Emma Thompson character, a lonely, “slightly prickly” 40-something who works for the Office of National Statistics at Heathrow.
Kate is “touched by Harvey who finds himself energized by her intelligence and compassion. The growing connection between the pair inspires both as they unexpectedly transform one another’s lives.” Encouraged by his new friend, Harvey returns for the reception and expresses his newly opened heart in a toast to his daughter, his new son-in-law, his ex-wife and her husband. There is no anger, ego, glibness, or cynicism in his toast—no “wedding war”—just words from the heart. Then everyone else’s heart opened in response. (Kindness and authenticity tends to work that way!)
Conclusion:
My “culture study” received enough sustenance with that one scene of Harvey’s toast to carry the day, shoring me up to continue my movie marathon. Perfect timing because the move previews I saw were full of some “scary” stuff! (And I don’t mean the bloody slasher movies. It looks like some ditzy-dialogue, angst-filled relationship movies are on the way.)
Topics: Empowering Girls, Inspiration, Women's Notes |









