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Speaking the language of ritual & relationship, folklore & costume, stillness & self-discovery... |
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You Have What You Are Searching For
By Cornelia Powell | October 30, 2009
Hmmmm. Is the first approach kind of like a dog chasing its own tail? I’ve done life like that before, until the wisdom of my heart overcame the noise in my head — or a wise friend said, “hey, over here — this way!”
I’m reminded of a story I read about a rare type of deer that lives in the highest area of the Himalayas. It grows a sweet smelling musk in its navel as it develops into adulthood. As the deer matures and becomes aware of the smell, it is not, however, aware of the source of the smell, so it goes from place to place sniffing in search. The smell comes from its own navel, but being unawares, the deer goes on searching outside of itself for the appealing aroma.
I remember being moved to tears when I first read that story. How like the musk deer we human beings can be. We search for love (happiness, wisdom, recognition, completeness) in relationships or objects outside of ourselves not aware that we ourselves are the very source of that joy; that somewhere deep within us lies an infinite source of peace, love and wisdom.
For me, the thirteenth century Sufi mystic Rumi said it best: “Whatever you do, wherever you go, be in love.” Not just with people and things that are appealing and sexy and easy to love, but be in love with that part of them — and especially that part of ourselves — that feels unlovable, that just can’t seem to get it right. If love is already what you are, then there is no such thing as unlovable; there is nothing to search for; there is only something to share.
So when you get a whiff of some irresistible, sweet smelling aroma; or feel something gently pressing into your chest, filling you up like a warm inner promise; or feel your heart open, expanding you beyond measure — just breathe it in! Breathe in that fragrance, that feeling, that sensation knowing it is the love you are that was there all along and will never leave you. You already have what you are searching for … all there is to do now is share it.
[Image Courtesy of www.deerlovers.com]
Topics: Inspiration, Relationship, Women's Notes | No Comments »
The Nature of Love
By Cornelia Powell | October 27, 2009
I’ve been in Atlanta over the weekend to attend a friend’s wedding (an extra delight for me because I got to visit with special family members!) I always find that weddings are a good place to observe the nature of love. Not just with the couple about to wed, but amongst their family members and friends, the caterers, the officiates, children in the crowd — myself!
For some, wedding celebrations bring out a sweetness, becoming a “safe” place to express love and tenderness. For others, weddings are an occasion where they feel a little melancholy because of the love they missed, or the wedding is a reminder of what they’re searching for.
Speaking of searching, I also saw Jane Campion’s new film, Bright Star … the story of the three-year love affair of early 19th century poet John Keats and Fanny Brawne. Like the other young men of the time who became known as the Romantic Poets, Keats (who thought of his life as a failure, dying at 25 before any public recognition) searched the beauty and mystery of nature and the stirrings of his heart and soul for the words to express what he felt. Another view of the nature of love.
In our over-physical, over-mental, separate-from-our-heart kind of modern culture, it is a deep pleasure to be reminded of a time (not so long ago) where just a beautiful poetic expression of soul-full words could move the heart to love.
So perhaps with the wedding festivities and the romantic film, I was reminded of a piece I started writing several months ago and was inspired to complete it and name it. It became this month’s feature article — “You Are What You Are Searching For” — in my “Woman Becoming” newsletter that I’ll post here in a day or two. Stay tuned!
Topics: Inspiration, Relationship, Women's Notes | No Comments »
Back to the Mountains
By Cornelia Powell | October 19, 2009
I recently returned to these glorious western North Carolina mountains from an extended trip to Alabama to visit family — especially to meet my six-month-old great niece, Ina, named after my mother. Her father, my dear nephew Will, and his new beautiful family live in the old family home where I grew up. So a very special visit indeed!
As wonderful as the visit was, driving back into the October lit, high energy mountains that I now call home, was an expansive, deeply satisfying joy. As the highway twisted and turned into the mountain range nestled between the Great Smokies and the Blue Ridge, I was reminded of a poem I wrote several years ago on another bright October day. I was driving from Atlanta to Nashville for a costume society meeting and felt that heart-opening experience when I started the climb into the foothills of the Smokies, and then had a wonderful “encounter” along the way that inspired me to write down what I was feeling. I thought you’d enjoy reading the resulting poem.
NASHVILLE BOUND
Cornelia Powell
25 October 2002
Follow me to the moon, the hillbilly shamans whisper,
on my way to light a lover’s forgotten trail.
Ancient legends warned of the path’s narrow dangers,
yet the misty here ‘n now reveal
mighty remnants of the gateway to paradise.
I’ve been here before in these rolling hills of wonder,
at deep peace and pleasure,
with nothing to forgive and all to surrender.
Forever in their promise—amens are spoken, anthems heard—
the trees give back their apparel.
Familiar festooned sentries line the ridge top
disguised as giant oaks and evergreens
silhouetted from both sides of heaven.
In the valley, Appalachian hawks circle the wagons,
and lead us not into temptation.
Mist rises through sharp slices of the rain gray’d mountains
like smoke signals from gods of our father’s world.
Golden October lights herald the opening of the hallelujah trail.
Hallelujah. Hallelujah.
Riding through glory on the back of a pick-up truck.
Topics: Inspiration, Relationship, Remembrances | No Comments »
Family Storytellers
By Cornelia Powell | September 30, 2009
My brother Daniel can twist a hunting yarn like a kudzu vine around a stump, bemusing you with his smile until his tale untangles just in the nick of time. My brother Billy’s laughter throughout his storytelling hints that the conclusion is going to be some wry twist to what you might expect if more sensible folk were his subject matter. And my sister Sallie finds those “curiouser and curiouser” happenings in life and brings them to the light of day with a sense of irony and a giggle, all to the delight of her listeners.
We have wonderful family resources to draw from: grandmothers and grandfathers and great-grandfathers. These characters — some rather curmudgeon-ly, others only pretender curmudgeons, and some just a delight of nature — had a unique way of expressing themselves in the world. Some of them at times even going against the grain of society, but never without a strong sense of justice and passion and compassion.
On the “gentler” side of this storytelling legacy was my dear Gummie. Gummie was my daddy’s mother, a woman enchanted by life of the late Victorian era with its attention to detail in dressing, gardening, sentiment and beauty. When I was a little girl, Gummie told me stories—stories that conjured up beautiful images as she described in textural detail the party dresses she wore as a young woman in Mobile, Alabama. I thought the words were from some ethereal fairyland: “ashes-of-roses”, “robin’s egg blue”, “crepe de Chine”. How did my grandmother learn this magical language? Surely if I could remember such words, they would unlock a door to paradise itself, my very own “secret garden.”
Gummie’s favorite stories were those in which she caught the eye of some handsome young man. Maybe it was the startling blue of her eyes that captured his fancy; or the glimpse of her ankle as she lifted her skirt departing the train when she arrived “up the country” in Carson, Alabama; or as she sat ever so gracefully playing the piano in church. My grandmother’s words created new worlds for me to explore — worlds alive with vibrant colors and exquisite imagery.
Long before I dared to imagine that I could be a writer, I was working on advertising text for my now former shop when some Victorian sentiment reminded me of Gummie. I stopped what I was doing to write down my imaginings and just allowed the words to flow forth, amazed at how poetically they landed on the page — as if Gummie was there telling the story in her sing-song voice. I loved the image that emerged on paper, capturing an essence of her, a piece of her life recorded. I remember thinking, “Oh, so that’s why we write—to tell our stories, stories that honor our heritage and open new doors.” And, it’s more than that — it’s as though in the telling we expand and overlap into each other, like an invitation into the other’s secret garden. Storytelling puts out the welcome mat!
Topics: Relationship, Remembrances, Women's Notes | No Comments »
New Dress Redux!
By Cornelia Powell | September 10, 2009
Enjoy!
Topics: Costume, Remembrances, Women's Notes | No Comments »
Make Haste to Be Kind
By Cornelia Powell | August 30, 2009
I’ve been thinking alot about “kindness” the last few days. No matter your politics, but if you tuned in at all to any of the coverage of Senator Edward Kennedy’s memorial services, you would have heard something like, “he was the most thoughtful and kind friend.” This from both Republican and Democratic colleagues as well as from family members and work associates.
We live in a loud, mean-spirited media culture that seems to get noisier and doesn’t appear to know their way around “kindness.” Has “kindness” become old-fashioned? Did Senator Kennedy’s death mark the end of the “respectful adversary”? Being able to disagree with respect; express love and appreciation for someone while challenging their take on something; not making the person wrong when you think their opinion may indeed be off base?
So I’ve been noticing my thoughts. And if at any time I catch myself having a negative or harsh thought — toward myself, someone or some thing — I stop and see where I can find the love and forgiveness in that circumstance. Is kindness not the action taken when we come from love and forgiveness? Then in the words of writer Ron Carlson, “make haste to be kind.”
I can’t think of a finer legacy to live toward. Here’s to the redemptive quality of kindness!
Topics: Inspiration, Relationship | No Comments »
How Do You Know?
By Cornelia Powell | August 19, 2009
~ Lavinia Plonka, from her article “June Bride”
What would be your answer if someone posed that question to you? I don’t know whether Lavinia’s mother’s advice about love is true or not — the nature of romantic love can get rather complicated, yes? But how do you know what you’re feeling about anything is true, much less the sticky subject of love?
Even when you think you are being rigorously honest with yourself, how do you know you can trust your decision — what do you use as a guidepost? How can you tell if your “wise-self” has kicked in or if it’s just your tricky mind telling you to take a right turn instead of a left, or that it’s okay to have another piece of chocolate, or that yes, this is “real love” and not just the “illusion of love”?
Sometimes I do a little check-in with myself when I’m wrangling with a decision: “Is my answer coming from my head, my heart, or my intuition? Where am I ‘feeling’ the answer?” My friend, Maria Gurule, a wise teacher and shaman, explains it something like this:
“Your head (your thoughts) may trick you; your heart (your emotions) may fool you; but your solar plexus/the pit of your stomach (your inner knowing) will never lie to you.”
When your “inner knowing” speaks — and you know when it does! — it takes courage to then act on that wise, intuitive, aware voice (especially when things “out there” are pointing in a different direction.) This is how Neale Donald Walsch, author of Conversations With God, counsels about making choices: “Look to your awareness, not to your thoughts. Your thoughts about things can betray you — and often do — because they are colored by emotions. Your awareness cannot.”
In our over-thinking, noisy frenetic culture, it’s important to slow down, be quiet, and listen inward — at least for a few moments each day. Otherwise, even your “aware self” may miss that ping in the pit of your stomach or not be able to hear the message of your wise “inner knowing.”
Gently breathe in and out with an easy, deep rhythm and listen for that still, soft place inside. It’s always there — a few quiet breaths away — and you can trust where it takes you. Here is where the difference in “real love” and the “illusion of love” — or the truth about whatever query is stirring your soul at the moment — becomes apparent. So when you imagine your life with or without something or someone, look inward to your awareness and you can indeed trust what you imagine to be true.
Topics: Empowering Girls, For Brides, Inspiration, Meditation, Relationship, Stillness & Relaxation, Women's Notes | No Comments »
Abundant Days
By Cornelia Powell | August 11, 2009
Driving through the Blue Ridge mountains the other day with friends, scattered amongst the late summer Black-eyed Susans, I got my first glimpse of goldenrod. A sign of autumn approaching, the spiky goldenrod blooms became a reminder of going back to school — accompanied by a knot in my stomach — and I shared the childhood memories with my companions.
How often does something in the present take me back to the past — good, bad or ugly? It was a little wake-up call for me to stay aware and not allow my thoughts to “have their way with me!” I can stay present even while telling a story of a memory — I just don’t have to “become the past” or have a thought take me off track, or down a road of regret or worry, or — well, you get the picture!
I can always declare — no matter what triggers a memory or where the memory takes me — that in this moment, “today is a divine, blessed, infinitely abundant day!”
Topics: Inspiration, Remembrances, Women's Notes | No Comments »
REMINDERS
By Cornelia Powell | July 24, 2009
Will refers to her as Lil’ Ina in his emails. Although I haven’t met her in person, every time I see that picture, she feels as close as if she lived here. Her parents are bringing her to visit soon — back to her roots, as I see it. I call her our “little mountain girl” because she was conceived when her mom and dad were visiting me last July for my birthday celebration. Hmmmm. Maybe that’s why this July birthday felt even more special … this smiling little soul is now in the world.
I’m surrounded by things here in my cozy mountain cabin — collected bits of antique lace, my grandmother’s Victorian cabbage-rose lamp, favorite books — as well as glorious views, smells, and energies of nature that are all reminders of the many blessings I have. And now there is this sweet face in the photograph beaming at me every day as well! The perfect cue for me to smile and be grateful.
What do you have in your life that is or that you can claim as a reminder that all is well — no matter the circumstances that may be swirling about? Sometimes we just need a little prompt to remember that today is a divine, blessed, infinitely abundant day! And sometimes it’s as simple as declaring it so. And then, so it is.
Will & Lil' Ina
Topics: Inspiration, Relationship, Remembrances | 2 Comments »
Memories in Clay
By Cornelia Powell | July 8, 2009
[I thought you'd enjoy this excerpt from an article in a past Weddings of Grace online magazine.]
Transplanted Asheville, North Carolina artist Michael Hofman’s parents’ 50th wedding anniversary was coming up and he realized the idea for the perfect present was at his fingertips. Michael works in clay, making beautiful objects—vases, platters, bowls—with subtle lace patterns imprinted in the clay.
Since Michael uses actual lace textiles to embellish his one-of-a-kind pieces, why not use lace from his mother’s circa 1957 wedding gown on a surprise gift? Without revealing details, Michael asked his mother to ship him her wedding gown and it arrived still in its original box from Selman’s of Louisville, Kentucky.
“I had an idea what he was up to,” Mrs. Hofman said when I phoned her in South Bend, Indiana, “and it was something I wanted him to do! Michael’s work makes such lovely gifts of remembrance, so when I saw how beautiful the vase was that he made for us, I was delighted!”
Michael also used hand croqueted lace from a tablecloth made by his father’s stepmother to decorate a platter for his parents, as well as for his brothers, to commemorate the anniversary. The wonderful bit of serendipity was that his grandmother was from Belgium and had made the tablecloth for Michael’s parents’ wedding present.
“By using porcelain, which is a special type of clay, I am able to craft pieces with a defined elegance of thinness and lightness but still have a profound structural integrity,” Michael explained about his work.
Although Joan Hofman’s wedding gown had been preserved for 50 years, textiles don’t tend to last forever and you can’t keep a wedding gown on the shelf to admire! But a lovingly crafted piece of porcelain imprinted with its textured remembrance is another story.
When I asked Mrs. Hofman about her wedding day in 1957, she remembered that it was unusually cold for November. “I shopped around all the fashionable stores in Louisville and found a dress at Selman’s that suited me well. Although it was short, in the ballerina length that was the style of the day, I was otherwise ‘covered’—not like the brides now!”
Michael Hofman told me a bit about how his parents had met and his mother filled me in. The story goes that when Emil Hofman was on holiday with friends from graduate school at the University of Notre Dame, he was in an automobile accident outside of Louisville and Joan Sherron was a student nurse at the hospital. “We were forbidden to socialize with the patients, but I guess we got around that,” Mrs. Hofman told me. She added: “Under the circumstances, my husband thought Allstate should pay for the wedding!”
Topics: Costume, For Brides, Inspiration, Relationship, Remembrances, Women's Notes | 2 Comments »
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